January 2009
I feel torn beyond my capacity.
Its like being pryed apart and each side is trying to rip me further from the other.
I cant be juggled back and forth and I refuse to choose sides.
I guess I’ll just have to suck it up for now.
I wish I remembered these moments more accurately.
Lindsey: We cant eat all these taco shells!
Mom: we can cover them in cinnamon sugar later like those weird things
Lindsey: CHURROS mom they're churros.
Me (to mom): and you call yourself mexican.
Mom: ...no I dont actually.
Me: good.
[[5 seconds later]]
Lindsey(referring to something my mom says): that could be in that dumbest celebrity quote thing.
Me: Too bad she's not a celebrity.
Mom: you guys suck.
“MOM! EVERYONE TALKS IN NARNIA!”
– Lindsey, replying to my mother’s excitement about the talking horse in Narnia.
7:51am
I can’t tell how today is going to be. My days haven’t been very consistent. I have a job interview today at 3 for Oak Tree Villa. Lets hope all goes well!
So right about now I should be doing government homework.
hurray for copying. So I’m at the library right now drinking a small light roast coffee.
My hair is a mess but my sweatshirt is comfy.
The school bell looms in its...
So
I’m either bipolar or I just get upset WAY too easily.
I want someone to love me like Courage loves Miriam.
Is anyone else insanely envious of their intense, morbid passion?
Franz Kafka
There’s a man’s mind worth remembering.
Last night I dreamed I was at a party and the gums to my teeth we’re hideously swollen and no one would help me. My mom ignored my excruciating pain and horror. It was before prom and my mouth was disfigured.
I can’t remember any more than that for now, but I will try.
“Imagine life as a game in which you are juggling five balls in the air. You name...”
– Brian Dyson (via justlia) (via robot-heart) (via spareunderthemat) (via catchakat) (via youwontfindhiminchina)
Doesn’t Remind Me —Audioslave
Does...
there's a bird on his shoulder.
Girl, Interrupted
This movie is really, I dont know, impacting my psyche.
Maybe Im just being melodramatic, but
I dont know.
I just think seeing girls in their positions makes me wonder about myself as well as others I interact with.
havent
posted anything in a few days I believe.
I might post something more interesting later.
oh and my mom is obsessed with fat guys in leatards.(sp?)
What do I think of when Saesha says "pancake"
yeah. there’s something wrong there.
Boy George.
Ahhh yes. How I wish I were alive in the 80’s.
I didn't think I procrastinated THAT much...
I’m pretty sure Im going to have to literally chain myself to my desk in order to write that term paper. I mean like full on CHAINED. locked.
I need to be locked in a small chamber with a computer that only has Microsoft Word.
I should do it like Gandhi and not feed myself until I write it.
We're Not Alone!
April! Someone else thinks its important too!
Flight of the Conchords.
Oh boy.
A certain person and I are going to have quite a time listening to binary solos.
x]
Like I've most recently realized...
CONTEXT IS EVERYTHING.
April: Haha my kindergarten class is watching the inauguration.
Me: Im pretty sure even blind kids are watching the inauguration.
April: What?!? >< Im lol'ing
Me: Haha. Omg I seriously feel like dying. Lil Wayne where are you when I need ya
April: Why do you feel the need to call upon Lil Weezy on this glorious day?
Me: I bet weezy baby is at the inauguration. Keeping obama's seat warm.
April: Lol WTFFFFF xD yhea I bet Tyrone Biggum be there too, sittin on Joe Rogan's lap eating some fried oyster skins.
Me: If its all the same to him, he'd like to be president.
April: i bet he wishes Barack would crash land in his eye.
Me: Dude it feels like barack, weezy, and kanye crash landed in my eye.
April: I dont even know what to say to that.
Me: Lolllllll
President Barack Obama
Proud to say he is finally our President.
As bad as they are...
Helen Keller jokes are ridiculously amusing.
http://www.jokechallenge.com/keller.html
yeahhhh Im going to hell.
ouch.
Mom: Lindsey, I'm throwing away your hashbrowns.
Lindsey: DARN!
Mom: They're all gross and old.
Lindsey: Like Grandma?
What girl isn't mean?
thats bad news bears.
Alice Practice —Crystal Castles
If you...
“[[while looking at pictures of my family]]…I feel disgusted in my heart.”
– April. wow.
TUMBLR! What's YOUR iPod's Name?
razzdrazz:
supersonicelectronic:
Mine’s “Chelsea Boots.”
Kilgore Trout, and I will consider marrying anyone who gets that reference.
Not that I’m elitist…okay, I am. Sort of.
Ballerina Mary. It was like an adoption, name already chosen by the previous person.
Except they engraved it on the back, and Im pretty sure that’s inhumane for anyone other than an iPod.
I got blood drawn today.
Then I had a burger at 11 am.
Then scored some shoes at the salvation army.
Then took a nap.
Ahhh saturdays.
Defiance
So excited.
Daniel Craig is a straight BAMF.
WatchZosifer, this video is downright amazing.
Im Pretty Sure
Im the dumbest dumb person ever.
Morning,
Great Gig In The Sky
playing in my ears.
Trying to chill out.
Not really knowing how today will go for me.
Lets hope for…decent.
she shoots, she misses horribly
I dont even know how to feel about it.
No, I know how I feel about it.
I don’t want to feel about it as I feel about it.
blarggg
So my lonely luncheon hour has brought me back to the library and back to tumblr.
Note To Self: Don’t care about what others think. Its ridiculous.
(after a discussion about counting down the days)
I think this is how our conversation went.
Lindsey: Mom can't count!
Me: Sure she can!
Lindsey: First you're against jesus, now you can't count!
Me: What's next, wooden nickels?
Lindsey&mom: ................ what?
Me: nevermind.
maybe?
Dare I make this a routine?
Blogging in the morning at the school library?
I do detest cold weather…
And I enjoy a nice blog…
It reminds me of my mindset from earlier which changes all too frequently…
I think I will blog every morning.
what say you tumblrs?
Growing Pains.
YOU, telling me to do things your way more and more annoyingly wont get them done. Get your priorities straight— they’re a lot different than mine.
YOU, don’t talk to me. You have no rights here. Don’t abuse your status either. I should pretend you don’t exist. And never ever yell at me ever again.
YOU, lets pretend that you actually have a say in what I do. Oh...
Gabby,
I watched all of Hillman Curtis’s short films.
And I realize how easily I am affected by other humans’ emotions.
Props to the actors and props to Hillman Curtis.
Natural Instinct.
You know when you and your friend talk about someone else behind their back?
I always wonder what they say about me.
The Unborn.
I don’t think I’ve ever laughed that hard about dead babies and Jews.
O.o
I wasn’t the only one.
Hey! Its the boy from Twilight!
Another movie that was a complete and irrevocable waste of time!
snacks.
I love it when my mom comes home with food.
Not just any food like milk or bread….
Snack food.
Apple crisps and sun chips and granola bars and chocolate almonds and well, you get the picture.
But you know that satisfaction that takes you by surprise? Its almost better than when you know you are going to be satisfied later. Had I known my mom was getting snack food, I wouldn’t be as...
“Don’t even get me started on how retarded you are!”
– April Rose Arratia. silly girl.
Garden Grove — Sublime
I had a difficult...
"Daddy" - Sylvia Plath
I don’t really know why I like this poem as much as I do. If any readers happen to like it as well, I recommend you find the audio of Plath’s voice, reading this poem. It may make all the difference.
“ Daddy”
You do not do, you do not do Any more, black shoe In which I have lived like a foot For thirty years, poor and white, Barely daring to breathe or Achoo.
Daddy, I...
say you will.
call me when you’re not medicated or hammered for once.
Pumpkin Spice Vegan Cookie.
see that up there?
thats jesus in a cookie-form.
the men.
Im making a list of all the men I want that I can never have (no particular order).
1. Johnny Depp
2. Jared Leto
3. Barack Obama
4. Usher
5. Robert Downey Jr.
6. young Brad Pitt (Fight Club)
7. young Tom Cruise (Legend)
8. Will Smith
9. young Matt Dylan (The Outsiders)
10. Jude Law
11. Mat Devine
12. Leonardo DiCaprio (Titanic)
13. Dax Sheppard
14. Owen Wilson
15. Luke Wilson
16....